Handsome Men
Which actors – if any – have had the kind of physical appearance or embodied gender qualities that you think you would like to possess?
Pansexual + Sodomite Org to Com
Pansexual Sodomite has moved to a new domain.
Anhedonic Slump*
Fear of your own life can cause you to deaden yourself emotionally.
Unhealthy Indifference
Amotivational disorder.
Inertia
On not modifying, changing habits and mode of life.
On Being Alone
On living by myself without a friend or lover as roommate or lifemate.
Suicidal?
Americans should have the right to remove themselves from among the living decently and with dignity. But Christian prejudice denies us that civil right.
Bravery
Am I timid, am I brave: while I don't want to be tested it leaves me feeling confused as to what I'm capable of.
Passive / Agressive
Comparative dominance, pushiness, control and direction in my loving relationships with other people.
Rogue Spasms of Empathy
Hidden signs of emotional distress, heartache after the end of a romantic relationship.
Looking Back on My Life
Looking at my personal history with a mix of regret and pleasure. A life imperfectly lived but with self-acceptance.
Ah, Heterosexuality
Whether I'm pansexual or queer often I find myself culturally estranged by the majority population of straight men and women.
Pansexual Sodomite : The Interview
Candid conversation with a queerly pansexual man from Durham, North Carolina.
Radiantly Malignant
A possible perception of my archetypal sense of my father whose evil temper so strongly shaped my life.
Of Birthdays - Mine Anyway
Depression, poverty: can even the love of a good transsexual woman keep me going or should I just die?
Renascence
Depression fades, joy returns: I'm reborn as the happy man I normally see myself being.
Talking 'til 2:00 a.m.
The joy of making a new friend, conversation, empathy and insight.
Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep
Tears on my pillow, hating life, unhappy to be alive.
18 Months ...
My lover became a drug addict, neglected reading my blog and I left him for someone else.
Despair
Intuition and intelligence at war with depression and hopelessness.
Ask the Pansexual Sodomite
Need advice? What can I tell you about pansexuality, being gay, loving transgendered and femme gay guys. This is your chance to gain an insight into my mind.
Vacuum
Lover out of the country, ex-lover recently dead. I have to learn to live in my house by myself all over again.
On Being Without Your Lover
The dismal, depressing feeling of being alone and lonely even if it is only for a few months.
Putting a dog down
Durham, NC: Animal control will come and get my ex-lover's dog.
Charm and vulnerability
On the dangers of being charming and the power of seeming vulnerable.
Thanks
Thanking people for letting me know how much they care about my ex-lover's death.
On loving a drama queen
My ex-lover overdramatized his life, unable to see the comedy and it killed him.
Death of an ex-lover
My former boyfriend Charles Alan Cagle died in my house of a drug overdose.
On internet friendship
Making and maintaining friendships made on the web.
Pristine Ann Gee
Man of two worlds, transvestite freedom fighter comes for a visit.
Evil yesterday
Watching my ex-lover scrap crack and cocain from my bathroom floor.
Geodon and Lexapro
Psychiatric medications that have given my bipolar, drug addicted ex-lover a better life.
Don't weep for me ...
Love is dead, time to just move on and enjoy life.
Charles & Remeron
Remeron - mirtazapine - seems to be helping my ex-lover cope with his depression and emotional pain.
Fat! Fat! Like a water rat!
When love gone bad leaves you fat and unlovable, unsexy.
Fall of the House of Richard
Durham, NC: porch swing collapsed, some of my house's wiring is shorted out.
On recovering
Love has died: my home, my health and my sexuality are all in need of rehabilitation.
One of the saddest nights of my life
My lover is addicted to crack and I had to leave the home that I own to get away from him.
I sent my lover to the loony bin!
My boyfriend winds up as a psychiatric inpatient for suicide prevention when I tell him we can't live together any longer.
Queer sexuality: finding out, coming out
For National Coming Out Day I write of my own discovery that I'm gay and coming out to loved ones.
Lovers who won't read your words (a followup)
I hoped my weblog would help keep me from leaving my lover but he wouldn't read the words I'd written.
What is your lover doesn't read your weblog?
If someone writes about themselves in public on the web and their boyfriend or girlfriend doesn't bother to read their blog does that mean they don't really care?
Crack addiction: relapse
Duke psychiatrist prescribes Neurontin which causes my crack addicted boyfriend to start smoking crack again.
Pansexual confusion
Love dies and the pansexual sodomite feels confused by his various desires.
Crack addict boyfriend update
The horror of living with someone addicted to crack, heroin and other drugs.
On talking to a virtual friend for the first time
Knew him on the web for years, finally I called him on the telephone and we chatted and had a good time.
Living with a crack addict: waiting for the conclusion
Time for my crack-addicted boyfriend to get his addiction under control or for me to move on with my own life even if I must leave him behind.
Brunswick Stew & corndodgers
Bought a new vegetable steamer. Wish I knew how to recreate the Georgia cooking my momma used to cook for me.
Crack, recovery, reconcilliation?
My boyfriend became a crack addict. I'm hoping he can learn clarity and we can live together and love one another again.
Black Beauty
I tried many drugs but nothing as as pleasurable as Black Beauty a form of speed popular long ago.
Molly and me and the crack makes three
I fear that mostly I just want to disentangle myself from the life of my crack addicted lover.
Fictitious friend
When my lover became a crack addict he invented a friend who does not exist to explain where he was and what he was doing.
Discovering he is a crack addict
How I learned that my love is addicted to crack cocaine.
I live with a crack addict
One discovering that my lover is addicted to crack cocaine.
Being aggressive
On coming to appreciate the value of seeming to be agressive. Agressive gay men get more guys. And it keeps pests and beggars at bay, makes store clerks attend to you.
Barking at trucks
Jailed for drugs in Statesboro, GA I came out of the closet to my daddy.
Days of psychedelics and roses
When I was young I was enjoyed my LSD. Never as equally excited by marijuana. And I'll never forget jimson weed.
The sodomite blahs
Down in the doldrums I'm reading Liebling and watching Jeeves and Wooster on DVD.
Laziness
My lover's laziness may end my relationship and a few words about the Friends TV show: fear of male touching, intimacy.
Persecuting by personal ad
On running a personal ad to get even with a bad man who has abused you.
I just bought a taxi
I buy a used cab from a taxi driver who works for Associated Taxi here in Durham, NC.
My lover can't shut his mouth
My boyfriend hurt his jaw in a bike accident but wouldn't go to the hospital until I made him.
Charles fell off the bike today
Wondering if I should leave my lover. He fell from a bike and hurt his head today. Hard to think of going when he is in pain.
Ask Dr. Magic Eightball
Nasty surprise: discover that your lover is stealing your money.
Sodomitical quietude
Quotidian note on one man's daily life, it isn't a gripping read. Love is a pain, work a chore. So it often is for many of us merely human beings.
Love is not loving
Gay man recounts the impending end of a romantic relationship.
Passion or the lack of it
Are romantic relationships worth having if there's no passion, no romance?
One gay man's romantic failures
Mistakes in love, errors in romance, loving wrongly, silly passion, bad lovers: even gay men can do all the wrong things when they are too romantic for their own good.
Unrealized sexuality: pansexuality
Being a pansexual man every kind of person, every type of body, every fluke of biology is worthy of love and lust.
The crack addict
Durham, NC: my lover brings a crack addict home and lets him stay in our house.
All the lonely people ...
Pharmacological psychiatry doesn't cure lonliness, gay men who want to be virgings are foolish and probably need sex more than psychiatry
Gay man: straight friends
I'm a gueer guy and most of my friends are heterosexual men - how about you?
Retrosexual homosexual
I'm a very sloppily dressed gay man who refutes the stereotype of queer eye for the straight guy.
Pansexual autobiography
Autobiographical writings of Richard Evans Lee who calls himself the pansexual sodomite.
What a queer sense of sexual identity
I'm so happy to be a queer guy and not a heterosexual man
The pleasures of paper & pen or at least long emails
Do emails and instant messages compare to the long letters people used to write to one another. Has the web killed the old epistolary virtues?
Liquor, booze, beer, rum, wine
Personal history of my drinking habits and alcohol enjoyment and abuse.
Christianity: from laughter to peevishness
How a born again youngster grew to be a happy atheist and spend years laughing at the born again
I got saved!
Converted at Bible Baptist Church of Savannah, GA, became a happy atheist once the nonsense wore off.
Bible Baptist Church of Savannah, GA
Tedious weird sad says at Bible Baptist Church of Savannah, GA, Pastor Cecil Hodges.
Insomnia
My bad sleep health, erratic sleeping patterns, years of battling with insomnia
My Orkut invite
A kind friend invited me to Orkut so now I'm an Orkutian or whatever members call themselves
What would be your first act on leaving your lover?
When I thought my boyfriend and I were going to split up my first thought was to cancel my cable TV service
The worst roommate of all time
In San Francisco I shared a flat with the most awful woman in the world
Father Lloyd
Bogus priest ran youth shelters, hostels in Atlanta and San Francisco and called himself Father Lloyd
Merry Christmas Sweetheart
Gay atheist buys his lover the Chuck Wagon Gang for Christmas
Of friendship
Friendships, best friends, the beauty, value and sanity of having kind and sane people in your life
Of public restrooms
On feeling uncomfortable in public toilets
Goodbye to 2003
This queer man, gay guy, pansexual fellow is happy to be alive
Funny gay prose, sexy gay music
Homoerotica search: any funny gay novels that you enjoy, queer music, musicians that you find sexy
Love? Bah! Humbug!
Gay men who have fights with their lover
Christmas without Santa, Jesus or even a tree
A happy gay atheist hardly notices Christmas day, doesn't reject it, just can't care about it
From Zoloft to Anafril
Psychiatric medications, doctors change from drug to drug in an attempt to help but often do more harm than good
On cowardice
Outgrowing childhood cowardice, youthful timidity, escaping fears, growing up and out of timidities
My daddy was a bastard
Back in Savannah GA I never loved my father, my daddy was one mean bastard
Fear of polyamory
Polyamory strikes terror in monogamous people but it is a sane choice
Confessions of a childish blasphemer
Pansexual, sodomite, blasphemer - that is me, Richard Evans Lee, laughing at Christians my whole life through.
Pain, despair, fear and bad psychiatry
DUMC, Duke University psychiatric resident's attempts at treatment only make my lover less well, more ill
Queer humanist? Gay Atheist? Sort of . . .
Pansexual Sodomite not a family friendly name for a gay man's blog, problems of queer webloggers
No Paxil, to hell with Lithium, here comes Lexapro
Charles quit Zoloft, no reason to try Paxil, Lithium and mesalamine don't mix, now he'll try Lexapro
Histrionic Sobriety
My beloved is away, will he return?
Savannah Public Library
As a kid I delighted in checking out books from a couple of Savannah's public library branches.
Best friends
Victor Obe Story of Alma, GA, Savannah, Georgia, Walterboro, SC, Chapel Hill, NC, Kutztown, PA was one of my very best friends.
Charles isn't home . . .
Isn't John Pizzarelli great?
On having an open nature
Being a confiding open person with some other people. Meeting other bloggers.
The sordid defilement of addiction
Television addiction: distraction instead of diversion . TV is a sad hobby.
Changing for the wrong reason
Becoming different because of a strong personal hurt.
What if? (questionnaire #2)
What if you lost your lover and job? A blog questionnaire posted on my weblog.
Gay man (a questionnaire)
Gay questionnaire: what attracts me, essential gay book, gay men of differening ages.
David Paul McCorkle
David Paul McCorkle of Atlanta and Albany GA.
Why weblog? (anniversary post)
Why weblog: reviving memories, clarifying opinions, understanding yourself and your past.
Psychotronic BBS, "Local," FidoNet & XRS
I was SysOp pf a hobbyiest computer bulletin board in Durham, NC. Member of FidoNet, supporter of offline readers for echomail.
The Atlanta Barb (gay newspaper)
The Atlanta Barb was a Southern gay newspaper in the early 70s run by Richard Evans Lee and Bill Smith who was the homophile representative to Atlanta's Community Relations Council when Maynard Jackson was mayor.
Foolish thoughts (abandoning your past)
Moving away and changing my name to forge a new life.
Hearing from an old friend
Having an old friend find you through your website or blog. Who was Marcel Duchamp's last lover?
Thanks Michael (blorky)
Having a weblog reader send you a donation via PayPal.
The root of much evil
Not having enough money to pay the bills.
Giton from Fellini's Satyricon
Giton, a pretty boy in makeup from Fellini's Satyricon.
Gay newspaper days
The Atlanta Barb, Atlanta's first gay newspaper, I was the associate editor back in the 1970s.
Bike stolen in Durham, NC
My bike was stolen from my garage in Durham, NC. Had counted on it to get healthy, shed body fat.
Sadly sexism, racism, homophobia have diminished
Women have been liberated, blacks have more freedom, homophobia has dimisned over the last 40 years but it is still ugly.
My friend of two worlds
Gay crossdressers, crossdressing, Yahoo's Tranvestite Groups Transvestites, fem boys.
Rednecks, Savannah, Scotch, Manhattan
Growing up in Savannah, GA with rednecks and wanting to move to New York City. Gay men, old movies.
Fragments from a Savannah, GA childhood
My life growing up in Savannah, GA, my momma, my daddy, church, black maids.
Grandparents and gay uncles
Savannah, Glenville, Newington Georgia, being raised by your grandparents, grandma, grandaddy and having a dead gay uncle.
Death to the human race
High school teachers, columbine, exterminate the human race, misanthropy.
Randall "Randy" Maddox of Savannah, GA
Randall Randy Maddox, Savannah, GA, unforgivable sin against the Holy Ghost, damnation vampire Vampirella comic books.
Savannah High School Days
Savannah GA High School racism, arrogance, childhood Richard Evans Lee.
Unsociable Richard
Unsociable Richard Lee, early self-revelation on my website.
Busted for a phone prank
Savannah, GA telephone harassment, pranks.
Femme gay gays, Eno, trashy yards
I'm in love with a sweet feminine gay guy
Stubborn queers
Fighting with my gay male lover
Happy anniversary to me (and Charles)
Two gay guys in love who bought a house together and got through it all
Sleepless in Durham
Migraine headaches Durham Regional Hospital North Carolina NC
Crystal confusion
Waterford crystal candle-holders and my gay lover
Remembering my momma
Growing up in Savannah Gardens back in Savannah, GA in the 1960s.
Never been closer to heaven, never been so far away
Just clarity, balance and acquiesce
Gratitude
Narrow Shaft of Bile
Frozen Times in Durham, NC
Medicinal Gluttony
A Fag without Fags, Day One Redux
Nubain
Withdrawn, Fuddled, Cranky
Thankfully
The Case of the Missing Rolex
The Man Baffled By The Human Condition
Damn it, Wayne!
Quiet Monotonous Simplicity
Stagnating?
Where have all the payphones gone?
Saturday before Thanksgiving Anniversary
Saturday before Thanksgiving Anniversary
Bipolar, panic attacks, generalized anxiety disorder, Crohn’s disease, acid reflux, migraine headaches
Charles is out of the hospital
Struggling for breath in Room 7128
Of Spoonfeeding My Beloved and Evil Nurses
Inbetween Visits to Durham Regional Hospital
Inbetween Visits to Durham Regional Hospital
Out of the ICU maybe today
Seeing Charles in the ICU
Baffled, Lonely, Impotent
Still Waiting, Hoping Charles Will Be Well
Praying for the phone to ring
My Charles is in a Coma
What is wrong with you?
Venous Stasis and Compression Stockings
In Raleigh with Charles
Meeting Charles in the Flesh
ILikeFrailGuys NC meets AvgGuy4LTRNC
This & That Make Richard a Dull Boy
Bedtime Story
Meatmen
John Blackburn’s Coley series, Meatmen, queer comics and a Fucking Machine.
Sex Tips for Straight Women from a Gay Man
Travis Fimmel is a beautiful blonde youth but there are NO photos of him on this web site.
Do Not Pass Go
More about my leg
"A physician is one who pours drugs of which he knows little into a body of which he knows less." - Unknown
"Disease generally begins that equality which death completes." - Johnson
This & That
Happy Halloween!
Some days are harder
Oh Those Genteel Folk in Savannah, GA
There's Such A Lot of World To See
"Nigger!"
Savannah, GA: race & racism in the 1960s.
Books Do Furnish A Room 20th
Something about journals and, um, ethics, I guess
Kitchen Sink Entry
First Editions, Racoons, Snakes
Pink Spots
A Charles and his money are soon parted
Gidd heads and afternoon men
Throwing adding machines down the shaft
Friendship
The moving hand writes and having writ not all your piety nor wit can call back a line of it
Tired
Charles is scared, very scared
A foot isn't always 12 inches
The awful stupidity of Television science fiction and Klingon fans.
Thank God Its Thursday
Bastard Toad Flax
The Pledge
Silly pledge of allegiance
Waterford Crystal and a jelly glass
Dreams of Doom
Sundry
Dead or Alive synthpop
Charles' Brush With Death
Terror
Damn Costco
Credit card troubles at Durham's Costco
Charles turns 29 tommorow.
He's just my roomate!
I have one of the best voices in the world
What we do for those we love
Gay Pop Culture
Comments
- bobby718500 on Feminine gay guys: what do they want?: I agree with all that propose that each is entitled to their tastes. As a bi-s
- jackey on Versatile?: I don’t know about others but I am all total bottom and proud of it !!!! I
- Melanie on A Very, Very Pretty Young Male: …damn… beyond compelling.
- jasmine on Feminine gay guys: what do they want?: Feminine gay guys are just part of this big melting pot which includes straight,
- cosmopolite on Circumsized vs. Uncircumsized: I have noticed for years that nearly all gay men are quite warm to the foreskin.
- Matthew on Feminine gay guys: what do they want?: As a “fem” gay guy, I’ll admit that most of the “jock
- emee on Androgynosexual, Androgynophillia: I am androgynosexual, I ONLY fall for androgynous boys(might be girls to, but it
- wannabefemale on Boy Becomes Girl: i feel how all the girls here feel. I may have a penis, but deep down i know i a
- Richard Evans Lee on Pretty Femme Gay Guys: The clip was amusing, thanks.
- Robert on Pretty Femme Gay Guys: Thought I’d share this… I filled the website box with the link. Sor
Elsewhere
Categories
